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Thursday, November 26, 2009
Title : Pathetic me
Time : 1:20 AM
Sometimes i wonder if i really control and bother too much. The more i care, the more i'll hurt myself. I wanna let go, but somehow i just cant help it. Feel so helpless at times, dont know how should i deal with this kind of situation. & i realised that whenever i need someone to talk to, i always cant find any. Pathetic or what? Sigh): Didnt know i was living in such a pathetic life. I wish time could go back, maybe back to sec 2. I think that was the best time i ever had in life. But i just didnt cherish it. So many nice and wonderful people just left one by one. Could only blame myself, i'm such a sucker. I still miss you, couldnt lie. But time just wont go back. I cant say i'm really living in a very bad life now, but its definitely not the best. God, why did you do this to me ? I really regretted everything. I think you're fair, i deserve all these. I've learned my lesson, would you pls stop punishing me now ? ): I really feel very pathetic and lonely all this while. Could you pls stop now? I beg you ):
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Saturday, November 21, 2009
Title : Am i over reacting?
Time : 5:33 AM
Disppointment is always there. I tried to stay happier and be happier. But i just fail all the time. Why? Why do i ve so many qns to ask you ? Fuck, i really got no mood to type everything out.
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Thursday, November 5, 2009
Title : Oppps !
Time : 5:36 PM
 Went for POA today, totally wasting my own time. I seriously know nothing, dont even know how to do the simplest trading account. Faint ! I sat there for about an hour and left for paper 2. Wanted to leave after writing my name for paper 1 but no early dismissal. So i was drawing on the paper, antry proof and my hand. Can you imagine how bored i am over there ? But finally over, i sense freedom now. Can dance all i want, nobody will ever nag me to study now. Gonna burn and throw all the books, just in case anyone were to ask me to retake again next yr. Line dance on sat, thought of the steps for wall 3 for rumba already. But intro how ? Faint ! Need help, and for the second dance really can bang wall die. Cant even count the counts for the starting, only the last 4 beats to start. Arghs ! No time to buy costume, so i'll stick with my red one :D:D:D Where is my jazz shoes now, faint ):
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Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Title : Go or not ?
Time : 8:30 PM
 Still wondering if i should go for my POA paper tomorrow.
Sigh ):
Saturday is the com, i'm not sure what to do for the intro.
Not sure if i wanna change the choreography on the 3rd and 5th wall for rumba.
For bring it i can die already, dont think i'll win this yr ):
But i'll still try my best, dont wanna let myself down.
Wonder why i cant do this for my studies as well.
Pathetic ):
Ordered two pieces of dress from LJ, hope it will come before saturday.
Cant wait for my new dress ! :D:D:D
Woots !
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Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Title : Just wanna be myself.
Time : 4:17 PM
Arghs ! Why do i not feel happy recently? Why do i have to retake my o level ? I dont wish to retake at all ! Why ?! I mean what's wrong if i only pass my english and chinese ? If anyone were to find me stupid then so be it la. I dont really care, why must i care what people think or look at me ? I know i will fail everything again, so what ? Why do i have to show others something that is not me ? I just wanna be myself, dont know why is it so difficult. Is not like if i fail my o level i'll be a failure in everyone's eye. I'm just tired of doing something i dont want to. Damn ! Stupid realistic world. I dont like you ! I dont like school, i dont like to study. I like to dance, i want freedom.
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Monday, November 2, 2009
Title : Time flies
Time : 6:39 PM
End of the year soon ! Oh, Happy Birthday Shannen ! 3 more paper to go, SS and Poa. Feel like giving up POA, gosh ! Feel so tired everyday, feel so irritated everyday. Wanna study for my paper, but i'll just fall asleep. Dont know what's wrong with me lately. Haven been eating, good time to slim down i guess. Dance competition next week, should i give up ? Not prepared at all. Why do i feel like giving up everything ? Sigh. Friends, love, family, studies, work and dance. Cant feel the warmth i need, who can i lean on when time goes down. Guess i'm alone now. Researching for my happiness. Where you go, i miss you so.
Seems like its been forever, that you've been gone.
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Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Title : Its's been so long
Time : 10:05 AM
Oh dear, its been so long since i update. Got no time seriously, was so super busy with dance, exams and work. Hmms, seems like break up season for everyone ? I dont know but i see many around me single now. Guess everyone needs a break. It is not too bad seriously. Cos when you're attached, you normally spend your time and money on the other half. But now, more tme for yourself and more money to spend. Dont be afraid to lose him/her. Cos i always believe the next one will be better (: Anyway, ariel and ashton left us to England already. I dint went to see her off, cos i know i will cry. I send her a text before she go and i was crying while typing the text. Can you imagine if i were to be there. But good news is she will be back 5 yrs later la. Phews ! Hope she become taller, sexier, and better slim down uhs ! As for ashton, i believe he will be taller la, & sexier on his voice :D Alright, i should be studying now, maths paper at 1430. Someone will nag at me if he see this post. Ciaos !
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